Visitors

The angels left a few days ago and i just worked up enough energy to write this.
Samandiriel pisses me off. If he joins our side, I don't know what I'm going to do.
I'm thinking murder, but I'm not sure if you can even murder an angel.  Maybe I can get Judas to help me.
I hate Sam's stupid imagination.  I think he really just wanted to try and convert us.
But i don't think The Big Guy enjoys him that much either- to much thinking.  And after all, imagination is a sin isn't it?
yeah.  I guess it is.
After all, i'm full of imagination right now.  Of how to get rid of Sam and how to fix the hole that is still in our kitchen.
Maybe i'll get Sam to fix the hole, then I'll push him through it and leave him forever stranded in Its A Small Small World.

I like that one.
I wonder what my dear old brother will think of this.  Or my mother.
We'll see.
~Apollyon

Angelic Visitors

This Wednesday, January 12th, the Palace of Gehenna will be hosting a few angelic visitors, who were originally on my side in the Revolution. Obviously, they changed their minds in the end, but I hold some hope that we can remind them of their original convictions, back in the good old days, and persuade them to join us here in Hell. The five Angels joining us are Ezekiel, the Angel of death; Hayyel, the Angel of wild animals; Liwet, the Angel of inventions; Samandiriel, the Angel of imagination; and Tabbris, the Angel of self determination.
I have high hopes for Tabbris, as he was one of the last to leave my side for that of the good, and we still hold correspondence sometimes. In fact, it was a letter he sent me recently asking me about affairs in my Kingdom that inspired me to invite these Angels to visit Apollyon and I.
Of course, I include Apollyon only as a side courtesy. He never has had much to do with the politics of our Kingdom of Sin, he was always just in it for the fun and excitement. Thusly, he always just tagged along at the secret Rebel Angel meetings, and I am quite sure he was incapable of forming any sort of close relationship with any of our fellow Angels.

--Lucifer

Keep Talking

Just keep repeating that "better son" thing Lucifer while I'm trying not to listen.
You get such a kick out of rubbing that in, don't you?
All because mom forgot me in that amusement park when I was five.  And didn't want to come back to get me.
Thanks a lot.

I thought big brothers were supposed to be caring and supportive.  So much for that idea.

What a lovely beginning to the new year, old memories.

What a perfectly charming family I have.

Dear Mother

First of all, Apollyon and I have been experiencing a little problem with the HellFire© over the last couple of days. It has been cooler by quite a few degrees, and we have been quite unfortunately hindered in our cooking abilities as well as experiencing severe torture withdrawal, since it is no fun to throw despairing souls into moderately cool raging flames. Since you keep a habit of tending to the fire, I hope you will consider taking a look at what could be going wrong.
Second of all, we recently got an occupant whom we are not quite sure what to do with. She has lead a very sinful life, and she seems to enjoy all of the chambers that suit her level of overall horribleness. Apollyon suggested that we promote her straight to demon, and skip the probation period of one hundred years. I was hoping you could interview her and help us decide what to do with her. She is currently residing in the guest room of the Palace of Gehenna, and with your consent, I will send her to your chambers.


Many thanks from your better son,
--Lucifer

Census Day

      Today is Census day. It’s my favorite day of the year, because I get to count how many people have joined our wonderful kingdom of sin and despair. Unfortunately, it also reminds me of how many we have lost, and sometimes just at the last minute. Like that Lazarus guy. He was totally sick and dying, and he had committed just enough sin in his life to qualify for the lowest level of eternal torture, Crying Babies. I swear, he had his left foot in the gate when suddenly that snarky little Jesus guy’s voice boomed out and called him back. Actually, first he bowed and scraped for his dad, and then he called for Lazarus to come out. Immediately, Lazarus began walking towards the exit. I knew it was a lost cause, but Apollyon thought it would be a good idea to grab onto him, and was almost dragged out into the world. I thank myself he wasn’t, or I wouldn’t have had anyone to yell at afterwards. Anyway, today we lost yet another one, but these days Jesus doesn’t talk anymore, the people are just held back from our eternal party by their own remorse and repentance. What a sad thing.

-- Lucifer

Post Moping Day

I never realized that we take Census after Moping Day.
What a wonderful way conclude it, another day of disappointment.
I think we should move Census a day earlier, get all the disappointment out of the way in a day instead of continuing it on.
This was a random idea... :/

Moping Day

Its Christmas. Today we mope.
I hate Christmas time.